Just When You Thought…

More often than not during writing dry spells, events, conversations, thoughts, they all add up until your mind is bursting at the seam. So why not have some fun, shall we? And for those who are not well-versed in my native tongue of sarcasm, bear with me. Because this is a lively little piece on the multiple “Just when you thought…” moments that life hurls at us.

Just when you thought:

  1. Your new degree and considerable work experience would be, in any way significant, during the job search for some thing YOU ACTUALLY WANT post-graduation…..STILL NOT QUALIFIED.
  2. You were FINALLY going to start up a regular exercise schedule to fill in for some of your excess of free time….NOPE.
  3. On that same note, that you would try to eat healthier…..WHAT?!
  4. Applying for your own health care plan would be a piece of cake and then being instructed to compare the different plans, read through their 50+ page booklets, choose your plan and your PCP all while waiting a year to finally get your insurance card in the mail…..WHAT EVEN IS THIS?!
  5. You’d do so well at keeping up with your close friends from college….*slowly looks over at phone*
  6. Your online classes for your Masters degree in project management would consume a considerable amount of your time during the week….not even. (Well, Managerial Finance exceeded expectations).
  7. This would finally be the Lions’ year to make something happen in the NFL, but then a team like the Philadelphia Eagles make them look like amateurs….Don’t care. I root for the Packers anyway.
  8. Us darn Millennials were lucky to be born in such a technologically innovative and advanced era….*starts to loathe what a detached, technologically-dependent culture we’ve been raised in.*
  9. Donald Trump would (enter at your own despair)…..Cause regardless of what you put….NAH BRUH.
  10. We could finally have honest conversations about race relations in America. Cause Colin Kaepernick, Dove, Charlottesville, Jemele Hill, etc……..Don’t even get me started.
  11. Fetch was going to happen….Image result for mean girls memes
  12. You were finally starting to get some sense of where your life was headed…..God: “New Plans!”
  13. The world wouldn’t be ready for the spectacular beauty radiating from the melanin that is Black Panther…..It still ain’t ready.
  14. You were over your “homesickness” for a whole ‘nother continent….Yeah, no. That never goes away.
  15. The grass was greener on the other side….But it’s actually just turf. *Gasp! My life has been a lie….*
  16. Detroit was a pit of despair……”Started from the bottom now we’re here”…sort of.
  17.  You’d have to go 4 years of college without getting a taste of some good ole Christian rap/hip hop performed during chapel worship, but then The Edge Urban Fellowship happens….Image result for ebony america's next top model memes
  18. But then it’s met with this reaction from 99.9% of the student body…and faculty….when any invitation is given to join in and sing or get hype….Image result for phoebe friends memes
  19. Adulting would be a healthy balance between fun and responsibility….Image result for cersei memes When it’s more like 10% “I tried” and 90% “What the heck am I doing?”
  20. Everything is just way too much…..

Image result for i'll find you lecrae….Thank you, Lecrae.

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